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Here's Bilal's original instructions for how this works...
Rules are as follows: You comment on this entry requesting an interview. I respond with five questions. The questions will theoretically be tailored to you based on what I know of you (or want to know). You copy and paste those questions into your own journal, and write the answers, along with these rules. Anyone wanting an interview from you continues the game by requesting an interview from you.
Don Hall came up with these 5 questions for me. I dig 'em. Good questions. I'll answer them all as well as I can. With a minimum of bits. Here goes!
1) You get to create one more show before you die. What's the show?
Give me The Goodman Stage for 3 or 4 years, an unlimited budget for staging and I will give the world a Staged performance of the Complete Sandman series by Neil Gaiman, covering every issue in digestible nuggets, with the visual spectacle to dazzle the audience. Gaimans words. My designs and staging, would be an unquestionable success.
2) You have the opportunity to 'download' one specific skillset (ala The Matrix) and retain it for six weeks, at which point you lose all retention of the skill. What skill do you download and what do you do with it?
I am really interested in "Parkour" lately. Parkour is the method by which one uses their entire body to run, jump, leap and bound across the cityscape. Leaping, sliding, swinging, flipping and dodging. It's also called "Free Running" and is basically the idea of crossing the urban landscape, passing the obstacles as cleanly and as efficiently as possible.
Remember the Opening Chase Sequence of Casino Royale? Yeah, well, the dude with the effed up face, that Bond is chasing, is Sebastien Foucan, who practices "Parkour" in France. One of the innovators of Free Running.
I'd like to be that graceful, that relentless, that fast, that unstoppable. That's how I move in my dreams. That's how the "inner me" moves. It would be cool if the "outer me" moved that way too.
Also, I answered this with the assumption that Flight wasn't a possibility. You know, because of gravity and whatnot, but if Flight were a possible 6 week download, I'd take that in a heartbeat. I would love to be able to fly around this lovely, lovely city.
3) If you were made up of only edible ingredients, what recipe cooks up some Biddle?
Take a big hank of beef, and drop it into a vat of beef seasoning for 12 years or so. Let it THOROUGHLY soak up the seasoning. Remove the meat and bake it in an oven, until the edges are crispy. The meat will be tough to chew, but full of flavor and will absolutely leave you filled, after an eating.
Additionally, serve with wine or beer. Lots of it.
4) What would it take to make your worst enemy your best friend?
Time, Distance, Vulnerability and Respect.
Time to forget whatever made him (or her) my enemy. Or at least enough time to "care about it less".
Distance from them to let the Time do it's work.
Vulnerability tells me that the other person is genuinely interested in resolving the issue and that they trust me enough not to tear them to shreds for showing their vulnerability. I would take that Trust pretty seriously.
Respect. If someone wants it from me, the first move, is to give it to me. And Respect isn't the same as Admiration.
5) In the movie of your life, is it a comedy, tragedy, dramady? Who plays you? Who plays your parents?
Oh, great question. Who HASN'T ever thought, "man, my life is JUST LIKE a movie." I've never cast the movie before. So, this will be a nice challenge.
I think that my life would be a comedy with dramatic moments. Something alone the lines of "The Royal Tennenbaums" alternating the fun stuff with the heavy stuff without actually becoming heavy, itself. In fact, I'd like my biopic to be directed by Wes Anderson.
For my mom, I see Meryl Streep. She can convey the sense of humor and the quiet emotions, when she divorces young and raises a boy all by herself. She's sweet and still pretty, despite the years. A good woman.
For my dad, I would hav eto cast some unknown stage actor. There aren't many actors who accurately convey my dad's quiet intelligence and his gentle nature. Dads just aren't cast that way, normally, in modern media.
Young me, would be played by the kid who played Nicholas on "Eight is Enough". Adam Swift or something like that. His look and demeanor in that show was pretty dead on who I was, at that age.
High School Me would be played by "Terminator2" era Edward Furlong. Dark, hurt eyes, skater-haircut and his very clear discomfort with anything other than anger.
College Age Me would be played by "SNL-era" Bill Murray. Lots of slouching and smartass comments. The guy who came onto girls in such a self-consciously casual way, that it disarmed them. Beloved by the very teachers who were failing him for his absences and lack of interest.
Moved-to-Chicago Me would be played by Current Era Dan Aykroyd, who would spend the last twenty minutes of the movie in his underwear, pinching his belly fat in disbelief and horror, saying nothing.
So, a bit of a bummer ending on what has otherwise been a fun, light piece.
Well, those are my answers to MY questions. Now it's your chance, in the comments section below, to ask for an "interview" from me and get 5 questions from me. You can post the answers over on your own blog or leave them in the comments section below (if you don't have a blog or don't want one). Obviously the questions that I give will reflect how well I know you. I won't, of course, be able to devise questions for anonymous commentors. So, weigh your need for anonymity against your desire to participate.
(In my opinion, participation always wins. Always.)
Get up on this!
Cheers,
Mr.B
EDITED TO ADD:
Fuzzy Gerdes posted my questions over on FuzzyCo. I will answer them here. I'll include my answers to other questions here, as well. In this postscript.
1. Cats or dogs?
Dogs.
2. Fries or mashed?
Fries.
3. Springstein or Joel?
Joel.
4. Denver or Florida*?
Denver.
5. Trick or treat?
Trick.
* aka mountains or the sea?
Ha! That was hilarious.
Now for Erica's Interview...
1. You have the ability to turn anyone or anything into a robot so you could enjoy their company for the rest of your years, who would it be? (note--not clunky like a robot, it would be like nothing changed about them, so I suppose more like an android.)
I'm glad you clarified. Because if I could turn anyone into a big, clumsy, clunky robot, the obvious choice would be Hendo. Just because his frustration would be funny to me.
Now that I know that it's meant to be a more human android type, I choose my dad. I miss him, terribly, somedays. And I he's such a gentle, calming influence in my life. Losing him, someday, is going to hurt. Badly. This robot deal will be a nice way to get around that.
2. Is there a moment in your life that from that point forward you knew everything was going to be different?
Honestly, my first El train ride in Chicago. In October, 2000. From the Jarvis stop to some other red line stop to get burgers at Moody's. The day after I moved here. Just watching the building go by as we raced through the city (My first el train ride anywhere ever) and I knew that this was going to be great.
I could not have anticipated then, that I would run into you fine people.
3. With absolutely no limitations of any kind (physical, mental, etc.) which job would you choose for yourself?
Easy. A writer. I wish I got paid to write clever or funny things. But I have no idea how to make that happen. So, I'm trying anything that comes up. Perhaps I'll happily stumble into that gig, by sheer determination.
4. If someone was buying you a round trip ticket to anywhere in the world, where would it be and what would you do there?
I think that I'd like to see the Northern Lights before I die. And have crazy, wild sex with some pretty lass up in some cabin, in the woods. So, Alaska. For sex and atmospheric conditions.
5. You become a guru to people in future generations. What do they admire/ study that you represent(ed)?
Wow. Goodness. I've never tried the Guru hat on, before. I cant imagine what people will actually try to take from having known me. Maybe, "lock up your daughters". But if I were able to actually choose what they got from me, it would be this, "Always ask WHY DO WE DO THAT about anything that anyone tells you to do. If everyone did that, then the methods by which we perform our artform would be under constant evaluation. And I tend to think that would be a good thing. Old, weaker ideas die out. Strong, stable ideas stick around and are built on. But that process begins by asking, Why?"
Great questions, Erica! Thanks for asking those!
Cheers,
Mr.B
27 comments:
all right, Biddle. You win.
Me next!
Sorry for the delay, Hendo. I was at a late lunch.
Here you go! (And please post a link here on where someone could see your answers.)
1.) What's the best compliment that someone ever gave you? Who gave it to you and what was the backstory on it?
2.) Say that the city of Chicago had unlimited resources to erect a monument of some sort to you, after your death. Where would you want it and what would it look like?
3.) If you could make one sweeping change across the entire Improv Community, including the theaters and how they operate (complete carte blanche to make any one change), what would it be?
4.) If you weren't living here, now, in your current life, where and when and how would you like to live?
5.) You get to enjoy dinner with any three people, real or fictional, for three hours, discussing or doing anything that you want. Who would you invite? And why? Also, what's on the menu for that very special meal?
I can't wait to see what you come up with!
Cheers,
Mr.B
Interesting... interesting idea and answers... alright I'm game... gimmie my 5 questions.
I loved Bilal's questions of me, so lets see where your questions go...
Hit me!
bran,
5 questions for you...
1.) Tell me about the best day that you can remember. The sort of day where you actually thought to yourself, "This is a very good day." What made it special?
2.) Describe for me the child that you would eventually want in your future. (If you don't want a child, you can describe a pet that you would want or a nice piece of furniture.)
3.) What was the worst job you ever had?
4.) In another dimension, you're an internationally known celebrity. Tell me about who that person is and why she's famous.
5.) Tell me one thing that you're right about and everyone else is wrong about.
And when you post the answers to these, come back here and tell me where I can see them!
Awesomeness!
COB
Erica,
This is going to be a blast!
1.) What is your theme song? You know, the song that just automatically comes on when you enter a room. What is it?
2.) If you could be best friends with any one fictional or historical character, who would it be? What sort of things would you two do together?
3.) You have an unlimited budget. So, what one present would you buy the following people?
Your mom and dad?
The people in the apartment above you?
Fuzzy?
President George Bush?
Me? (Because I was nice enough to think of everyone else, I think I deserve something.)
4.) What reality show would you kick ass at? Which one would you fail miserably at?
5.) Finish this sentence, "I think the world would be a better place if everyone would _________ ."
And hit this site again to tell me where you posted your answers. (Also a URL to the questions that Bilal asked you would be cool, too!)
Cheers,
Mr.B
Awesome--I have to run out for a bit but I will be back this afternoon to properly answer. Fun questions! I haven't yet posted Bilal's questions on my site--I should do that soon--but for now I am "midgetbusdriver" in his mondo comments on that thread if you wanna flip through them. ROCKETY ROCK!
I'll try my best to post these tonight or tomorrow on my blog, I promise. In the meantime, here are my answers.
1.) What's the best compliment that someone ever gave you? Who gave it to you and what was the backstory on it?
Don DePollo once told me that the writing I was doing in his classes was better than the stuff that was being put up on the ETC stage. But he also said I was too young and needed some more "seasoning" before they would ever be able to hire me. That, and they already had a thin guy with glasses (which is what I looked like at the time… surprise, surprise!) I was 20 at the time, and couldn't hear the wisdom of what Don was telling me… the talent was there, but I needed more life experience.
2.) Say that the city of Chicago had unlimited resources to erect a monument of some sort to you, after your death. Where would you want it and what would it look like?
It would be a huge theater complex, with two 60-seat venues, two 120 seat venues, and one 350 seat venue, and it would be solely for improv and sketch. And the rent would be free or very cheap to groups wanting to play there.
3.) If you could make one sweeping change across the entire Improv Community, including the theaters and how they operate (complete carte blanche to make any one change), what would it be?
Every player would get paid, and every coach, director and teacher would get paid more. In return, you could only perform with one group at a time, coach/direct one group at a time, and teach one class at a time. Hopefully, this focus with financial rewards would push the art-form harder, and stop it from just being a f*ck-around, which it is most of the time.
4.) If you weren't living here, now, in your current life, where and when and how would you like to live?
1950's Manhattan, running a nice supper club, where I would come out a sing a few songs during the course of the evening. Everyone would be dressed to the nines, the men would be classy, the women would melt the polar caps, the food and drinks would be outstanding, the atmosphere hip and cool.
5.) You get to enjoy dinner with any three people, real or fictional, for three hours, discussing or doing anything that you want. Who would you invite? And why? Also, what's on the menu for that very special meal?
Mohammed, Buddha and Jesus would be invited, and we would discuss the state of the world, and how they caused it. And what they would say to the people that use them as a weapon. We'd be eating broiled mahi-mahi steaks, because of the various foods their three religions can't eat. When dinner was over, we'd save the last hour for some light-hearted Jarts and/or bocce ball. No talk about religion or politics allowed. Then we'll see who the most competitive one is (outside of me). My money is on the Buddha.
BRAVO, HENDO! I honestly could not have anticipated any of those answers. (Except maybe the improv one.) Those are Grand!
I hereby formally request an "Interview" from you. 5 questions that you can post here.
Also, you are a gay homosexual.
Cheers,
Mr.B
1) where do you consider your "home" to be, and why?
2) When you consider the perfect mate for yourself, do you focus more on the aspects of wife, or on the aspects of mother of your children, and why?
3) You have one year to live and unlimited resources. What do you do with that last year, and why?
4) what differentiates yourself from others in your artistic field, and why?
5) You have the ability to go back in time and change ONE thing. What is it and why?
and optional number 6:
Why are you so crazy gay?
Good Questions, Hendo!
Here you go!
1) where do you consider your "home" to be, and why?
That’s easy. Chicago is and was and ever will be, my home. I never felt like I fit in, back in the Bluegrass State. Chicago was big and beautiful and busy. All things that I wanted to be a part of. I’ve been very happy here. I can’t imagine living anywhere else.
2) When you consider the perfect mate for yourself, do you focus more on the aspects of wife, or on the aspects of mother of your children, and why?
I’d say more on the wife stuff, than the mother stuff. It’s very rare when I imagine myself as a parent. It only happens occasionally. But I ALWAYS imagine my life, lived in a loving, happy, stable relationship with some smart, sexy, confident, mature, sexually-aware, bisexual woman. And her girlfriend.
Just kidding.
I focus on perfect mates as partners in my life. Partners to who I am, right now, instead of who I might eventually be, if I choose to spawn.
3) You have one year to live and unlimited resources. What do you do with that last year, and why?
Set up a comfortable place to die. A cozy, happy home here in Chicago. Then, once my nest is set up and ready for my eventual deterioration, I travel. A lot. I spend time in London. I see Hawaii. I visit LA and New York. I travel to Russia and see that. China and the Japan. I spend a week or so in Australia. I base jump and sky-dive. I paint a few pictures and try to write the books that exist only in my head. Towards the end, when things are winding down and I am dying, I return to my nest and die with as many of my friends as I can afford to fly and be by my side. I have two sexy, nubile, gals on call at all times and when I feel death creeping across me, I ask them to crawl into bed with me. I pass them both $10,000 and die, softly cradled between both pairs of their beautiful breasts.
That last part sounds like a joke, but it’s not. I can’t think of a more peaceful, happy way to go, than between two sexy ladies.
4) what differentiates yourself from others in your artistic field, and why?
Christ, Good Question, Hendo.
Let’s see if I can phrase this right.
I am unique within my field, because I possess an attractive confidence that comes from equal parts of experience in the field and the blissful ignorance of not knowing what things I can’t do, until I try them. I look like I have it under control and sometimes I do. Other times, I just don’t appreciate how hard something is going to be, until it gets pretty hard. And I hide that well behind something that looks like confidence.
Confidence opens up a lot of doors that are otherwise closed.
5) You have the ability to go back in time and change ONE thing. What is it and why?
That’s a tough one. Do you use it for selfish reasons and improve your own life or do something huge to help other people.
This is a boring answer, but I go back and smother Hitler in his crib.
That spares the life of 9 million + human beings, who go on to have children and their children have children and spread out myriads of possibilities to get to our world, today. Additionally, because of the Death of Hitler, there is no World War 2, which probably means no creation of Israel in the Middle East and that defuses major points of contention in our current world. Germany enjoys a slow climb out of the desolation of World War 1 and doesn’t bear the stigmatism of Nazism.
Granted, there are no promises that this would totally end World War 2. Perhaps there would be a different war of some kind! Italy and Japan versus the US alone! People die, nonetheless. But there would be more people, 9 million more to stand around and suggest that we NOT all get embroiled in a huge world war.
It’s just too many lives gained in exchange for one death. I can’t pass up that huge of an opportunity.
and optional number 6:
Why are you so crazy gay?
No, YOU are gay!
1.) What is your theme song? You know, the song that just automatically comes on when you enter a room. What is it?
I've always thought that it was "Frank Sinatra" by Cake. I love that song. Even when I read this question, it totally popped into my head again. So that one. But knowing how nuts I am it should probably be something from like Mr. Bungle or Ween or something. But you know what? It is probably the Macarena. Yeah. It might have just chosen me that way.
2.) If you could be best friends with any one fictional or historical character, who would it be? What sort of things would you two do together?
Hmm....Kermit. We would sing songs to our friends and basically make everyone feel warm and happy inside.
3.) You have an unlimited budget. So, what one present would you buy the following people?
Your mom and dad? I would pay off Dad's doctor bills and their credit cards. But if I had to buy something physical, I would buy them a bigger dishwasher or a in home screening room.
The people in the apartment above you? Beds. They just got back from being on national tours, so I think they are both on air mattresses.
Fuzzy? A Nikkon D80 or an iPod
President George Bush? Shit--a new brain?
Me? (Because I was nice enough to think of everyone else, I think I deserve something.) You totally deserve something! I would buy you your new tattoos. Or tix to see Rent live in NY.
4.) What reality show would you kick ass at? Which one would you fail miserably at?
I think in my heart of hearts I would be great at America's Next Top Model. I have dreams that I am in the competition and actually doing good, then I wake up and realize that I am too old and a "plus size" model.
I would fail miserably at American Idol, Amazing Race, Fear Factor, Survivor...basically, the rest of them.
5.) Finish this sentence, "I think the world would be a better place if everyone would _(any of the following) stop taking themselves so seriously, stop fighting, smile more, laugh more, realize the importance of friends and family, stop being so shitty_ ." Sigh...
Erica!
Those answers rock.
My new tats? Tickets to RENT? YEAH! Absolutely!
That was WAY too easy for you. Those questions were tailor made for you, young lady!
Now then, I hereby formally request an Interview from you. 5 questions. Any 5 questions.
GO!
Cheers,
Mr.B
PS. That reminds me that I need to load some Cake onto my ipod. Thanks, Erica!
So Funny--I was just about to ask you questions anyway!
1. You have the ability to turn anyone or anything into a robot so you could enjoy their company for the rest of your years, who would it be? (note--not clunky like a robot, it would be like nothing changed about them, so I suppose more like an android.)
2. Is there a moment in your life that from that point forward you knew everything was going to be different?
3. With absolutely no limitations of any kind (physical, mental, etc.) which job would you choose for yourself?
4. If someone was buying you a round trip ticket to anywhere in the world, where would it be and what would you do there?
5. You become a guru to people in future generations. What do they admire/ study that you represent(ed)?
Don gave me five questions, and since he and I know each other very well and you and I know each other . . . not very well. . . I hereby request five questions.
-goose (Dave Goss)
Hi Dave,
I'm happy to give you your interview. Just be sure to come back here and let us know where we can see it.
Word.
Mr.B
Dave G,
This is your interview!
1.) What was the last time that you laughed so hard that you actually physically hurt?
2.) Tell me something that you did, that you're really, truly proud of.
3.) Tell me about one of your heroes. Who inspires you?
4.) Which superpower would you have, if you could have any one? And what would you do with it?
5.) Why did Xmen3 suck as badly as it did?
The people awate your response.
Mr.B
Those answers were lovely. Thank you.
I really want the five questions. I was too shy to ask before. Is it too late?
Elsie
Not at all. I consider it a standing offer.
Elsie,
This is your interview!
1.) If someone, the same size and build as you, wanted to fight you, who would win? Do you have the Fighters Instinct?
2.) Defend Michael Jackson's musical legacy.
3.) A famous botanist has named a flower after you, because it reminded him of you. Why? What characteristics do you both share?
4.) Tell me about one of the most beautiful places on the planet where you've actually been.
5.) Tell me about one of the best gifts that anyone has ever given you.
Be sure to post your answers here or a URL link to where we might read them.
Awesomeness.
Mr.B
Okay I decided to post my answers on my myspace page, since I had edited some of it. I'd had a few drinks last night and noticed a few errors in the am.
http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog
I don't know if you all can access my post, because it is semi-private. Here is the link anyway: http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog&pop=1
Thanks, Mr. B!
ELSIE
My answers are up on my blog. check it at
http://blog.myspace.com/hendo65
It took me long enough, but here are my answers:
http://gosscountry.com/blog/index.php?blogid=1
Thanks, Mr. B!
-goose
Great answers, Mr. Goss. Particularly the bit about what made you laugh. Tugged on the old, atrophied, Don't-Have-Kids-Yet threads of my heart.
Very Nice work, sir.
Mr.B
Thanks, brutha'.
And for you, sir. . .
1) You order a footlong sub with turkey and bacon. You grab the first half, and just as you prepare to sink your teeth into it, you realize that you accidentally pulled all of the bacon out of the second half along with it. Do you: a) put the extra bacon back onto the second half to spread out the tasty goodness, or b) eat a footlong sub’s worth of bacon on the first half of your sub for a bacon blasted taste sensation?
2) How many tattoos do you have and what do they all mean?
3) Who are you listening to these days?
4) If you could spend a week looking through the eyes of another person, who would you choose and why?
5) What are your top five favorite films of all time?
Wait, I just read your comment on a later post and learned that you have one tattoo and plan to get many more. So here's another question to replace that one:
2) Name a song that makes you get all emotional every time you hear it.
-goose
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